Dont go and -CHANGE- the way i am
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Friday, March 18th, 2005

Time:12:06 am.
Mood:traumatized.
just to think if i didnt take will to the hospital he'd probably be dead. i'm so worried right now i've been crying. i was there from 2-9:30 and i wanted to stay it was so hard leaving him just to see him scream and cry. please be strong baby everything will be okay. please god make everything be okay. i cant say everything that happened today, i just cant talk about it now. i love you baby so much. SO much. Everything will be okay and we'll get engaged and married soon just like everything was planned. your my life. ill come see u first thing when i wake up. i need to take more sleeping pills so i can be able to sleep and have the strength to go there tomorrow. I love you!!!!

xo*ox Tracy xo*ox

.
. .
. . .
.
please i just want someone to hold me right now, that's all i want. . .just hold me. everything will just be a nightmare. hold me.
3 heartbreakErs| With an empty hole in my chest, my bleeding heart lays before my feet

Friday, March 11th, 2005

Time:11:11 pm.
Mood: bored.
Its been a while woop woop im sitting home on a friday night! Awesome shit. I miss all of my friends, i feel like i haven't seen them in ages. All i have been doing is focusing in school. It's paying off though straight A's!! Goddamnit i'm so fucking bored and i think Will's sleeping out tonight so it might be my first time sleeping alone in like two months, yeahhh homie the whole bed to me and bebe!! I miss everybody so i think over spring break all you motherfuckers should call me up and hang out. . .Okay now i know why i haven't updated this shit in a while, Livejournal Sucks ass! =)

xo*ox Tracy xo*ox
1 heartbreakEr| With an empty hole in my chest, my bleeding heart lays before my feet

Saturday, February 5th, 2005

Subject:my new taxi. . . .
Time:7:07 pm.
Mood: happy.
thursday and today was awesome!!! thursday = bright eyes!!! It was so amazing! i went with will and adrienne, and saw dallas and stephanie <3333 Seeing them live made me have enen more respect for the band. seriously fucking amazing alcoholic!!

yesterday i went to starbucks with will and met up with emi,chico,madison, star, and james! God how i love starbucks!!! i miss hanging out with emi, tis okay we had our late night emi and tracy girl talks so it made up for it.

annnnd today my daddy took me to Sawgrass Ford, fuck yeah!!! i was going to get a black 2005 mustang BUT, they had a Yellow 2005 mustang with the TOP edition (have to special order and since its backed up it takes like 6 months to get them.) Well they had ONE because someone specially ordered it and then decided on wanting the GT. So yep 2005 Mustang in yellow is my new baby!!! it's a lot faster then my other one and the interior is fucking gorgeous, it drives fucking amazing, the stereo is fucking awesome, and you can change the dashboard colors!! and the whole mustang is all redesigned so it's a much better car all around! and i'm all happy cuz i never saw the 05 mustang on the road in yelllllow yet, so yay! i love my baby!!!!!!

xo*ox Tracy xo*ox
7 heartbreakErs| With an empty hole in my chest, my bleeding heart lays before my feet

Sunday, January 23rd, 2005

Subject:the partys in the parking lot!
Time:5:05 am.
Mood: sleepy.
I missssed Jamie so much, for serious man! i think we attempted to go to like what? 2 or 3 parties haha got to love them cops! whatever though i had more fun in the parking lot with jamie and her friend gabby then any kegger!! i love jamie, shes, unlike most of the people i know, R-E-A-L haha. We have to hang out more!!! so all in all i really didnt do much tonight. the mall to drop off will, then to the parking lots with jamie and gabby!! l0l, then once i got out of her car i realized my whole ass was soaked fucking water in the backseat.

I havent updated this shit in like a month, the only things that really happened was Will moved into her for now, and started classes for his GED yay! I started B.C.C like the beginning of the month and all i've been constantly doing is homework woop woop , starbucks like whoa, and parking lot parties with people! woop


p.s.- Jamie i'm going to get you a belated prezzie. i didnt know it was your birthday!!! hapy bday anyway

xo*ox Tracy xo*ox
6 heartbreakErs| With an empty hole in my chest, my bleeding heart lays before my feet

Wednesday, December 29th, 2004

Time:1:47 am.
Mood: cold.





mmmmm this kid is so perfect :) he makes me happier then ever, and i've wanted him to be with me since i met him. . . you stole my heart baby




will slept over last night, we woke up, laid around, i changed a billion times, then we went to hot topic, gauged my ear to a 7/16, picked up Dallas!!! (my baby), we went to keegans *freddie & weston were there*, some trailer park fights (scared me and dallas), then went home with will. . .and.. we. .took a nap ;), then i took will home, came home, and now im talking to chris online and he's making me jealous as shit! you bastard!! i still love you though =) and that was my exciting day!!! woo ohh yeah i got my gauges today in the mail. . .12 mm thru 3/4 . .mmm all i ask is for my ears not to rip!. .oh yeah and i also got Ali & Tommy's engagement announcement thingie in the mail, cutest picture i'm jealous


xoxo

p.s.- i think Will liked is present . .he wears it everyday
7 heartbreakErs| With an empty hole in my chest, my bleeding heart lays before my feet

Saturday, December 25th, 2004

Time:1:38 pm.







*mUaH :||: mUaH*

xo*ox TrEeCy xo*ox
4 heartbreakErs| With an empty hole in my chest, my bleeding heart lays before my feet

Thursday, December 23rd, 2004

Subject:Belated Hanukkah SHopping haha
Time:2:32 am.
Mood: cold.
Okay yay finally i found something that i think Will would like and i got it, it took me a long ass time to find something so i hope he likes it. Woop I'm Officially one broke ass hoE!!

. .and my cat really weirds me out with her infatuation with flushing the toilet.

Okay i think it's time for me to go to bed

ZzZz |:| xo.trAcy.ox |:| zZzZ
3 heartbreakErs| With an empty hole in my chest, my bleeding heart lays before my feet

Saturday, December 18th, 2004

Time:3:58 am.
Mood: ecstatic.
AHHH its liek 4 in the morning and i cant fall asleep, my eyes and body are wide awake! And Will already fell asleep =( i ve been trying to sleep but i cant cuz my hearts ebating really fast and i keep thinking im in places where im not....=/ and Will made me have an EXTRA awesome night! thanks baby!

xoxo muAhZ xoxo
lOvE,
TraCy
4 heartbreakErs| With an empty hole in my chest, my bleeding heart lays before my feet

Wednesday, December 15th, 2004

Subject:Ramos said everyone should do it. . . .
Time:1:50 pm.
Mood: blah.
THREE THINGS I AM WEARING RIGHT NOW
1. jammy pants 2. A bra
3. jammy top

THREE THINGS ON MY DESK
1. cell phone
2. alarm clock
3. candles

THREE THINGS I WANT TO DO BEFORE I DIE
1. Be Successful
2. Own a corvette
3. Get married

THREE GOOD WAYS TO DESCRIBE MY PERSONALITY
1. Care-Free
2. Giddy
3. I don't try to be like anyone else

THREE BAD THINGS ABOUT MY PERSONALITY
1. Moody as fuck
2. Procrastinator
3. Fickle

THREE THINGS I LIKE ABOUT MY BODY
1. my feet
2. my legs
3. my lips

THREE THINGS I DON'T LIKE ABOUT MY BODY
1. stomach
2. ass
3. boobs- will be fixed in two years tho

THREE THINGS I SAY THE MOST
1. fuck
2. shit
3. goddamnit

THREE PLACES I WANT TO GO
1. Amsterdam
2. London
3. Canada..again

THREE NAMES THAT I GO BY
1. Tracy
2. Treecy
3. Tracy Tree

THREE FOODS I LOVE
1. Pizza
2. Pasta with Alfredo sauce
3. Japanese food

THREE FOODS I DESPISE
1. PEANUT BUTTER!!
2. Liver
3. Cooked Fish

THREE BOOKS I LOVE
1. Pure
2. My astrology book
3. Ted Bundy

THREE DRUGS I LOVE
1. cocaine
2. i've onlyr rolled once so i cant say i love it or not yet
3. . . . .

THREE FAVORITE PAST-TIME
1. drinking and then puking the next morning EVERYNIGHT
2. smoking weed alllll the time
3. haha and driving around Ali's gulf cart smoking cigz hiding it from her rents'

THREE BEST DATE SPOTS
1. Carnival
2. Beach - at night time
3. Amusement park

THREE FAVORITE BANDS
1. Bright eyes
2. My Chemical Romance
3. MSI


THREE FAVORITE DRINKS
1. Coke Icee
2. Iced Tea
3. Starbucks Coffee

...[more coming soon]...
1 heartbreakEr| With an empty hole in my chest, my bleeding heart lays before my feet

Sunday, December 12th, 2004

Time:2:08 am.
Mood: tired.
skylinebe
You are "Bowl of Oranges". You see life
to more than what most people do and you
genuinely care about people. You feel art and
music is the sure way of lifting your spirits.
You wish others could have appreciation like
you do, but, unfortunately, you are probably
the only one.


Which BRIGHT EYES song are you?
brought to you by Quizilla




im tired as fuck, satisfied and upset. i met my mom at the millenium mall today and we went shopping i bought a few cute clothes and a really pretty white leather jacket with furrrr haha and and and i bought a rainbow chair and some other cool shit. i came home packed 90 percent of my shit...and attempted on dying my hair all blonde. . . didnt turn out really well, actually didn't turn out good at all. you know when you try bleaching your hair and it turns out orange. .well...thats what happened to me..and im so fucking upset about that you have no idea, my blonde pieces got like platinum and everything else turned orange, so when i go back down im making someone take all the orangey pieces and making them pink..any vulenteers - goddamn i dont know how to spell. . . .

great have to wake up super early tomorrow to put my shit in the u-haul...drive down...unpack...go to BCC...sign up....and take like a long ass placement test. CANT FUCKING WAIT...hopefully ill get to see my baby though I MISS YOU


xoxo muahs xoxo
tracy
5 heartbreakErs| With an empty hole in my chest, my bleeding heart lays before my feet

Thursday, December 9th, 2004

Subject:guess whos back, back again! TRACYS back!
Time:11:47 pm.
Mood: awake.
Good news for some and bad news for others! i'm moving back bitchhhes! ;) prepare yourself for the return of pyscho bitch!

woooo fort liqourdale here i coooome!

on
SundAY!


xoxo *mUaHz* xoxo
<3Tracy
5 heartbreakErs| With an empty hole in my chest, my bleeding heart lays before my feet

Monday, December 6th, 2004

Time:7:25 pm.
Mood: sick.
ahh i feel liek complete shit i wish the pain would go away!!!!!!! somebody just fucking kill me!

one
word
of
advice


never try yay! ever!!!


i miss will ='(
5 heartbreakErs| With an empty hole in my chest, my bleeding heart lays before my feet

Wednesday, November 24th, 2004

Subject:Fort Liquordale here i AMMM
Time:8:39 pm.
Okay so me and Nicole drove down to Fort Lauderdale last night. I didn't really tell anyone, except James because i didnt have a chance to see him last time i was here. So we went straight to James' house and hung out with him and Will, and then Nicole dropped the three of us back at my house and they slept over. I miss those guys sooo much!! *heart,heart* and then today me james and nicole went to Western to see some people and i saw DALLAS and Freddie and Hannah and a couple other people, and then after we went to the Broward Mall and met up with Freddie. Dropped freddie and james off at freddies and then will came home with me and back to freddies we went. . .i want will to sleep over tonight but he can't bcuz dads not going to work tomorrow errr. Anyway nicole just came over and we're probably going to go pick up Will right now and then go visit Adrian cuz she wants to come play with me haha!!! whoooa homie what a boring ass entry!!! i still want to hang out with a lot more people while im here!!! like ali and ramos and kristin im going to call them up tonight or tomorrow! and if i cant call you its because my phones a POS and call me and leave a message. buh bye xoxo


oh yeah PS i gotta a new tat and its extra sexy
3 heartbreakErs| With an empty hole in my chest, my bleeding heart lays before my feet

Monday, November 15th, 2004

Subject:Its so hard to see when your eyes are open hahahaha
Time:2:09 am.
Mood: nervous.
I'm going on my first date tomorrow in god knows how long and im nervous and nicole wont let me drag her with me =(((((( Wow this could be the first time a guy is going to take me out to dinner and pay for me!!

and he has black hair and hes pale and hes skinny and has a lip ring and hes in a band *heart heart*



i really want to go to vero tomorrow to go to Danielles, but i can't because i have to close on the apartment tomorrow and i didn't know that and i really wanted to tell you but i dont have your number and you havent been online since i found that out, im SO sorry but im coming over some other day this week i promise, iloveu!
4 heartbreakErs| With an empty hole in my chest, my bleeding heart lays before my feet

Friday, November 12th, 2004

Subject:I*M*P*O*R*T*A*N*T
Time:6:16 pm.
Okay so I am moving into a 2 bedroom apartment (still in Orlando) And i'm looking for a roommate, so if anyone is moving up here and wants to be roomies with me tell me. it'll be about 450 a month, and its right by UCF and Valencia.

xoxo *mUaHz* xoxo

Tracy
3 heartbreakErs| With an empty hole in my chest, my bleeding heart lays before my feet

Tuesday, November 9th, 2004

Subject:SHRIMP AND LOBSTER SAUCE!
Time:4:56 pm.
Mood: cheerful.
Monday im going to go down to Vero and visit Danielle and mom! and we're going to have tons and tons of fun just like old times! we'll stiff the chink waiter and ride the zippers and smoke out your mom. but this time go to the beach without getting caught! aww i miss you! and i cant wait for some good italian cooking~ woop woop

xoxo *mUaHz* xoxo

Tracy
3 heartbreakErs| With an empty hole in my chest, my bleeding heart lays before my feet

Sunday, November 7th, 2004

Time:6:56 am.
cannnnt sleeeeep ah
3 heartbreakErs| With an empty hole in my chest, my bleeding heart lays before my feet

Friday, November 5th, 2004

Subject:How can anyone love me, when all i do is loathe myself?
Time:1:52 am.
Mood: disappointed.

feeling helpless to change myself,

i never used to be this way.

 Life fast and to die young

 i'll be buried by the age of twenty fucking one.

i look in the mirror just to hate what i see,

 the type of person that i could never imagine to be.

 Wake-up every morning with the same thought on my mind,

Which substance to take today so i don't have to face reality,

 it's so much easier to live this life.

 

 Puking,cutting,swallowing,snorting,fucking,stealing, and fighting,

 I used to have so many different views, i used to have morals and goals.

 But now i dig myself deeper and deeper into this hole,

i'm never going to  change.

 

And no this isn't a poem, i'm just putting my thoughts into words.

 

xoxo *mUaHz* xoxo

<3 Tracy

5 heartbreakErs| With an empty hole in my chest, my bleeding heart lays before my feet

Thursday, November 4th, 2004

Time:2:56 am.
Mood: drunk.
im so durnk right now i just knocked over like a few signs and took 1 home FUCK ya i took like 20 something yager shots tonight and fuck, i got kicked out of the bar for falling asleep on the pool table!!!! wooo good FUCKING night we have a stranger in our house WHO THE FUCK ARE YOU!
2 heartbreakErs| With an empty hole in my chest, my bleeding heart lays before my feet

Wednesday, November 3rd, 2004

Time:1:20 am.
Mood: blank.
stumble around the neighborhood
with nothing to do
you're always looking for something
to
*sniff*, *smoke*, or *swallow*
calling over next door to see what they got
but you would settle for anything
that would make your brain
slow down
or
stop



**********************************************************
hmm the past few days have been interesting. the day before halloween i got drunk and me nicole steve brian sean rima and mary went to my brothers costume party, i had a lot of fun, esp seeing steve dressed up as a girl!

pictures drunk before the costume party. . .
title or description
title or description


********************************

halloween my mom came up and threatened to send me to rehab but she cant make me so to piss her off i got my septum pierced again and so that night me nicole rima mary went to some tripple kegger. then we met up with some high school kids on the street and scared them and then we went back to the kegger, lost the car keys, FINALLY found them, and then the car wouldnt start, so we had to get a ride home from a car full of drunk niggers and almost died on the way home, then we met up with jesse *who had lots of bars* and all them and finally got back at the house at 4 in the morning and jesse slept over, halloween wasnt that great...
pictures from halloween of me nicole rima mary scuba brian and sean

title or description
title or description
title or description

*************************************************
then yesterday i went to the pub with mary rima and met up with jesse jeff ken kyle richard and the rest of their crew, and i swore up and down i wouldnt drink...but..then it happened..all of a sudden i take one shot and then that turns its 19 shots WOO i was drunk and then we went back to richards apt and hung out there until like 3 and then we all went home and puked a lot.

***************

today i went to my therapist and im being evaluated next week for bipolar disorder! awesome! and then went to lunch with my family, came home, slept, and went to see 'SAW' with nicole and it was the shit times like a million, and then i cleaned out my car at the taco bell line and ate a whole bunch of food, and now im talking to ali online and i miss her a bunch times a million and three!


this entry sucks, sorry

xoxo *MuAhZ* xoxo

<3 TraCy tReE

p.s. * i have a crush on a boooy! and his name starts with a J and ends with an E!<3333
14 heartbreakErs| With an empty hole in my chest, my bleeding heart lays before my feet

LiveJournal for Tracy.

View:User Info.
View:Friends.
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View:Memories.
You're looking at the latest 20 entries. Missed some entries? Then simply jump back 20 entries.